Giant Erection Sends Man To Hopsital – Vitamins To Blame!

I couldn’t make this shit up if I tried.

Christopher Woods of Manhattan, New York, is suing the maker of the health drink Boost Plus, because he claims the vitamin-enriched beverage gave him an erection so large and so hard, that it would not subside no matter what he tried. He says he had to be taken to the hospital in order to get this giant erection under control.

Being 29 years old, I hope that Woods (OMG, if that last name isn’t just perfect for this story!!!) put his new found wood to some good use before going to the hospital.

Woods (ha ha ha… I just can’t get over that last name) said he bought the nutrition beverage made by the Novartis pharmaceutical company, at a drugstore on June 5, 2004, and drank it.

Novartis’ Boost Plus Web site describes the drink as “a great tasting, high calorie, nutritionally complete oral supplement for people who require extra energy and protein in a limited volume,” in vanilla, chocolate and strawberry. No mention of giant erections, but marketing is taking this under consideration as I write this article.

According the court papers, Woods woke up the next morning “with an erection that would not subside” and sought treatment of the condition, called severe priapism. Now, I am not sure what all Woods tried to do in order to get rid of the giant Erection, but I am certain that having two hookers come over and party with you is cheaper than what Woods actually did. Woods underwent surgery that day for implantation of a Winter shunt, which moves blood from one area to another. Myself, I would have taken two hookers at night and called the doctor in the morning.

The lawsuit, states that Woods had problems that later required additional hospital visits and penile artery embolization, a way of closing blood vessels. Closing off some blood flow prevents engorgement of the penis with blood and lessens the likelihood of an erection. Man, if those doctors can talk a guy into preventing future erections, they certainly earned that $50,000.

Brandi Robinson, a spokeswoman for Novartis Consumer Health Inc. , said Tuesday the company was aware of the lawsuit but did not comment on pending litigation. She had no comment on Woods’ wood.

Now, if you think I am making this shit up, I don’t blame you, but you can read this story as reported in The Washington Post.

I can’t wait to see what happens with this case. Just to be safe, I don’t plan to drink any vitamin water unless my wife is out town. Just in case.